The battle of guilt and finding forgiveness

Forgiving someone is a very difficult thing to do, especially when that person is yourself. When we mess up or we do something wrong, this instinct called guilt kicks in usually not too long after we've done something wrong. When it comes to being guilty, it often feels like what you've done is too much for God to forgive you.I know I've been feeling this lately; I've been struggling with overcoming an eating disorder. Just a few short months ago I ate no more than 700 calories a day and I did detoxes and tried everything I could to lose weight. I started at a healthy weight for my body I am 5'3" and I weighed 125 pounds. Once I began not eating I lost weight very quickly I went from 125 to 112 in a matter of weeks. I don't think anyone knew how bad my not eating was because I didn't tell anyone. I'm not particularly sure what "sparked" the not eating but one day I guess I just thought I would just lose a couple pounds but it became and addiction. Recovery is probably one of the more difficult things I have had to endure but I have started eating again and I work out every day and I am trying to get healthy without gaining too much weight from eating again. I confessed and told a few people about my eating disorder, including a couple of my youth leaders, one of which had struggled with anorexia herself and has overcome it. I did not tell my family or friends about my disorder, although I am pretty sure my mom already knew. My mom is my best friend and not telling her hurt because I knew that if she knew she would be more than willing to help me recover but I also assumed that she would be very upset with me which isn't fair of me to assume. I struggle with this a lot, when I hide something I become depressed and lose my sense of judgement. Not too long ago I sent things like pictures and words to boy that I shouldn't have sent and I got wrapped up in the attention they were giving me. Once again I'd forgotten who I was. I am guilty of the sins I've made and dealing with things I shouldn't be. In Colossians 1:20 it says "20 and through him God reconciled everything to himself. He made peace with everything in heaven and on earth by means of Christ’s blood on the cross. 21 This includes you who were once far away from God. You were his enemies, separated from him by your evil thoughts and actions." The second part of guilt is figuring out how to forgive ourselves for what we've done. This step is often very difficult for me to overcome. I often don't know how to forgive myself for what I have done even though I know God has already forgiven me. I am still working on it but I will be alright. I am guilty but I know that I am forgiven and loved, and I hope you realize that too.

god's glorious visions

hey guys, I haven't written in a while...I apologize for that. Here's whats new, I have been doing leadership for my youth group at church. I have been doing it for 2 months now and I absolutely love it! It has made me much more brave than I ever was before! In the middle of feburary, we went to winter camp where I experienced the holy spirit moving in my life more than ever before. He spoke to me and gave me a vision to start a christian club at my highschool. At winter camp there was a girl named jael in my room and she is a sophmore like me and she happens to go to my school. (crazy thing is that I have been going to youth group for about 5 or 6 years and I had never met her and there are only 4 sophmores in our entire youth group and there are only about 5 or 6 people who go to Jackson highschool) Jael and i got to talking and we realized god was weighing the same thing on both of our hearts! He wanted us to start a chrisitan club at our school. The more Jael and I talked the more we relized that this was what we needed to do to majorly changes lives in our school. God is great! So now we are working hard to get the club started. I can't wait to see what God does through us in our school!!!! let me know how all you guys have been doing! I'd love to hear from you with any prayer requests, encouraging stories or even if you just need a new friend email in at Michaelaw98@gmail.com. you can add me on instagram @caylie_willis and snapchat at caylie13

A teenage life in gods footsteps

Hey guys. So I am starting a new thing on this blog. This is going to be a year long process or maybe more depending on the outcome. This will be all about teenagers and the things we go through and we will get to discuss different issues. So I have decided that each month there will be a brand new topic for teens and every week of that month we will expand a little more on that specific topic; I will ask a question and you the viewers and readers will be allowed to comment your thoughts and just be open telling me what you think. I think that this is truly an amazing way for our teen community to become more involved and really be able to be heard. On this blog and especially in this new series I am starting called a teenage life in gods footsteps, there are only a few rules:

1. Please no inappropriate language
2. ALL IDEAS are welcome and appreciated
3. Expand your thoughts and be understanding bout other peoples ideas and opinions
4. Read and enjoy!!! 💜

I really hope that you guys like this new series and give me feedback on it! :D thank you so much we will be officially starting our first topic of this series on Saturday June 14th I hope you read it and enjoy it :D.

Hey guys,
I know that I have not written in a truly long time and I apologize for that I have been catching up on school and life and I guess I just forgot. I love doing this blog for you guys and I think that this blog is amaizing, which is why I want to get other people invoked in it too. I think that this blog should be open to discussion and ideas on each topic. So we are going to do like we did before and we are going to have a new topic every week but you, my readers are going to be able to comment and add as much opinion and ideas on the subject as you want. I really feel that this will get people involved and being heard. I will also be making a Facebook page for this so please join and get involved :D

Weekly bible talk week 10 breaking and building trust

hey guys I am sorry I know that I have not written in a while as I have been busy with school and my  basketball team. Merry Christmas! and happy New Year!!! Crazy it is already 2014! I know that it is a new year so I am most likely going to have a new twist for the blog for this year but until I figure out what that will be I am going to continue the weekly bible talks. Ok well this week we are talking about building and breaking trust. A lot of people do not realize that relationships are two-sided! You have to understand that to get trust and love out of a relationship you have to put trust and love into that relationship. Trust is probably the biggest part of a relationship, it can make a relationship solid but it can also tear a relationship apart if the trust is broken. Build your trust with your parents and show that you are trustworthy and you will be rewarded. We build up this mountain of trust, little by little doing things that allow you to earn your parents trust. Once you are at the top of the mountain, you let your guard down and you sneak out for a party or borrow your dad's car and wreck it, they find out and your mountain of trust begins to crumble apart. Bad choices leave you to no trust left with your parents. With every decision that we make can break or build trust. Trust takes a while to build but just seconds to break. It is not hard to build trust; all you have to do is communicate with your parents. Tell them when you're upset or angry. Take a minute to sit down and talk with your parents and just tell them what is going on in your life. Believe it or not your parents have been down this road before, they understand so talk to them! When you talk to your parents, it builds a strong bridge of trust and allows them to trust you to make the right choices. proverbs 7:1 Says: my son, hold to my words and treasure my commands with you. This is basically saying that we should listen to our parents and trust in them because they know what they are doing. Obey your parents because you obey Christ! Tell the truth to your parents. Nothing is more powerful than the truth. You are either trust building or trust busting. Build trust with your parents; just start but talking to them.

Nicole's movie

hey guys so over the past two weeks I have been creating a video for Nicole about all that she has overcome and to tell her that we all love her so much! check it out on youtube at: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=veAnOnZOANs&feature=youtu.be dont be afraid to comment. :) thanks!

Nicole

Hey guys so about that story I told you in my last post, her dad has actually created a blog for her http://nicolesrecovery102613.blogspot.com/2013/10/102613-evening-started-out-fun-dressing.html 
that is the link for her blog also I am in the middle of creating a video for her I'll post it when it is done! :) let me know what you think about the blog and send me any other comments thanks!